STEEPED IN A MISTY MORN OF MUSINGS...

WATCH OUT FOR #15, in particular,

WHEN VOTING IN ANY

OF THE 2016 POLITICAL PRIMARIES!!!!!

1. THE PATHOLOGICAL LIAR is skillfully deceptive and exceedingly convincing. Avoids accountability by diverting topics, dodging questions, and bluffing. His memory is self serving as he denies past statements. Constant chaos and 'a rerouting of reality' is their preferred environment.

Defense Strategy: Verify his words. Head for the door when things don't add up. Don't ask him direct questions - you'll only be inviting more lies from this artful dodger.

2. THE CONTRACT BREAKER agrees to anything but then turns around and does the opposite. Marriage, Legal, Custody agreements, normal social/personal protocol are meaningless. This con artist will accuse you of being the contract breaker, which is simply outrageous. Enjoys orchestrating legal action and playing the role of the 'poor me' victim.

Defense Strategy: Expect him to disregard any agreement. Have Plan B in place. Protect yourself both financially and emotionally.

3. THE HIGH ROLLER: Successfully plows and backstabs his way to the top. His family, a disposable prop in his success facade. Is very charismatic, eloquent and intelligent in his field, but often fakes abilities and credentials. Needs to have iron-fisted control, relying on his manipulation skills. Will ruthlessly support, exploit or target others in pursuit of his ever-changing agenda. Mercilessly abuses the power of his position. Uses treachery or terrorism to rule or govern. Potential problem or failure situations are delegated to others. A vindictive bully in the office setting; has no social or personal conscience. Disappears quickly when consequences loom.

Defense Strategy: Keep your references and resume up to date. Don't get involved in anything illegal. Document thoroughly to protect yourself. Thwarting them may result in backlash with a cascade of retaliation.

4. THE SEXUAL NARCISSIST is often hypersexual (male or female). Pornography, date-rape, and incest are reported by his targets. Anything, anyone, young, old, male/female, are there for his gratification. This predator takes what is available. Can have a preference for 'sado-maso' sexuality. Since easily bored, he demands increasingly deviant stimulation.

Defense Strategy: Expect this type to try to degrade you. Ted Bundy behaved in this manner. Get far away from him. Expect him to tell outright lies about your sexuality simply to evade exposure of his own.

5. THE BLAME-GAME NARCISSIST never accepts responsibility. Blames others for his failures and circumstances. A total master at projection.

Defense Strategy: Learn about projection. Don't take the bait when he blames you. He made the mess, now let him clean it up.

6. THE VIOLENT NARCISSIST is a wife-Beater, Murderer, Serial Killer, Stalker, Terrorist. Has a 'chip-on-his-shoulder' attitude. He lashes out and destroys or uses others (particularly women and children) as scapegoats for his aggression or for revenge. He has poor impulse control. Fearless and guiltless, he shows poor judgment. He will try to make you look out of control. Can become unpredictable. Has no remorse or regard for the rights of others.

Defense Strategy: Get away when you can; plan your exit route carefully.

7. THE CONTROLLER/MANIPULATOR pits people against each other. Keeps his allies and targets separated. Is verbally skillful at twisting words and actions. Is charismatic and usually gets his way. Often undermines our support network and discourages us from seeing our family and friends. Money is often his objective. Other people's money is even better. He is ruthless, demanding and cruel.. Appears pitiful, confused and in need of help. We rush in to help him with our finances, assets, talents, etc.
Defense Strategy: Know the 'nature of the beast'. Facing his own failure and consequences will be his best lesson. Be suspicious of his motives, and avoid involvement. Never, never bail him out in any event.

8. THE SUBSTANCE ABUSER Alcohol, drugs, you name it, this N does it. We see his over-indulgence in food, exercise or sex and his persistent need for instant gratification... Will want you to do likewise.

Defense Strategy: Don't sink to his level. Say No very explicitly.

9. OUR "SOUL MATE" is cunning and knows who to select and who to avoid. He will come on strong, sweep us off our feet. He seems to have the same values, interests, goals, philosophies, tastes, habits. He admires our intellect, ambition, honesty and sincerity. He wants to marry us quickly. He fakes integrity, appears helpful, comforting, generous in his 'idealization' of us phase. But it never lasts. Eventually Jekyll turns into Hyde. His discarded victims suffer emotional and/or financial devastation. He is an opportunistic parasite.

Defense Strategy: Seek therapy. Learn about this disorder. Know the red flags of their behavior, and "If he seems too good to be true...he almost certainly is".

10. THE QUIET NARCISSIST is often disorganized, dirty, and unkempt. Odd thinking is observed. Used as a disguise only to 'appear' pitiful to obtain whatever he can.

11. THE SADIST is now the fully-unmasked malignant narcissist/sociopath. His objective is watching us dangle as he inflicts emotional, financial, physical and verbal cruelty. His enjoyment is all too obvious. He'll be back for more. His pleasure is in getting away with taking other people's assets. His target: women, children, the elderly, anyone vulnerable.

Defense Strategy: You must face and accept the Jekyll/Hyde reality. Avoid him altogether. Don't allow thoughts of his past 'good guy' image to lessen the reality of his disorder.

12. THE RAGER flies off the handle for little or no provocation. Has a severely disproportionate overreaction. His rage can be downright frightening. He wants 3 things: control, attention and compliance. In our hurt and confusion we struggle to make things right. Any reaction is his payoff. He seeks both good or bad attention. If he can get attention by cruelty he will do so. That totally works for him.

Defense Strategy: Be fully independent. Don't take the bait of his verbal abuse. Expect emotional hurt. Violence is possible.

13. THE BRAINWASHER is very charismatic. He is able to manipulate others to obtain status, control, compliance, money, attention. Often found in religion and politics. He masterfully targets the naive, vulnerable, uneducated or mentally weak.

Defense Strategy. Learn about brainwashing techniques. Listen to your gut instinct.

14. THE RISK-TAKING, THRILL-SEEKER never learns from his past follies and bad judgment. Poor impulse control is a definite hallmark.

Defense Strategy: Don't get involved with his risky antics... Say No.

15. THE IMAGE MAKER will flaunt his 'toys', his children, his [trophy] wife, his credentials and accomplishments. Admiration, attention, even glances from others, our envy or our fear are his objective. He is never satisfied. Yet, he can quickly alter his mask 'at will' to appear gracious, humble, solicitous, or truly concerned.. Appears as the perfect father, husband, friend - to those outside his home. In truth, he's none of these.

Defense Strategy: Ignore his childlike behaviors and tantrums. Know that his objective is either getting attention or deceiving /abusing others. In an emergency, however, one may need to provide him with 'narcissistic supply' to avert problems.

16. THE EMOTIONAL VACUUM has deceived us by his cunning ability to mimic human emotions when he entirely lacks all empathy. We are left numbed by the realization. It is incomprehensible and painful. Those closest to him become objectified and expendable.

Defense Strategy: Face the reality. These folks can even deceive trained professionals!!

17. THE SAINTLY NARCISSIST proclaims high moral standing. Accuses others of immorality. "Hang 'em high" he says about the murderer he sees on the 6:00 news. This hypocrite lies, cheats, schemes, corrupts, abuses, deceives, controls, manipulates and torments, all the while portraying himself to be of high morals.

Defense Strategy: Learn the red flags of behavior. Be suspicious of people claiming high morals. NOTE: Can probably be spotted at a church near you.

18. THE CALLING-CARD NARCISSIST weirdly forewarns his targets. Early in the relationship he may 'slip up' revealing his nature by saying "You need to protect yourself around me" or "Watch out, you never know what I'm up to." We laugh along with him and misinterpret his words. Years later, coping with the devastation left behind, his victims recall those fateful chilling warnings.

Defense Strategy: Know the red flags and be suspicious of the intentions of others.

19. THE PENITENT NARCISSIST says "I've behaved horribly, I'll change, I love you, I'll go for therapy." Appears to 'come clean' admitting past abuses and asking for your forgiveness. But claims that his behavior is actually 'your fault' and that you need to change too. The sincerity of his words and actions appear totally convincing, though his words are mere 'verbal hooks'. He cunningly knows our vulnerabilities and what will work on us. He dupes us into questioning our judgment about his disorder (i.e., a technique referred to as gas-lighting). We foolishly trust he'll change; we minimize past abuse. His re-targeting attempt is allowed to reign successful if we allow him back into our lives.

Defense Strategy: Expect this. Impose a "No Contact" rule. Focus on the reality of his disorder. Journal all past abusive behavior to remind yourself.

Hence,